Santa Gets a High-Tech Sleigh: Historic Journey Made Faster, Safer

Filed in archive Fun Events on December 24, 2009

Apparently there are those who feel that Santa's reindeer should be shuttled off to the sleigh museum. In today's fast moving, high-tech world, they insist that Dancer, Prancer and the rest just aren't quick enough, while Santa lacks the tools a contemporary driver needs to travel tens of thousands of miles in a single night without missing a single chimney.

Several designers in Europe have proposed high performance self-driven sleighs to make the once-a-year trip easier. The folks at GE, however, prefer to keep the reindeer in service, perhaps feeling that the animals have developed a highly sensitive GPS from centuries of use. So their engineers have created a new sleigh concept for Santa, using 10 key technologies.

(1) The sled itself is made from GE's specialized carbon fiber composite materials, lighter than metal but just as strong.

(2) Icephobic coatings are sprayed on the exterior of the sleigh to prevent ice buildup while traveling through new-fallen snow.

(3) Self-powered OLED lighting helps increase visibility: Indeed, GE is partnering with a thin-film battery company to make OLEDs that don't require a power outlet, making illumination possible even in the most remote locations.

(4) Ultra-light, super durable sleigh blades made from ceramic matrix composites instead of metal enable more efficient flight and cut down on rooftop "clatter."

(5) GE sodium batteries store energy and provide supplemental power for the sleigh, offering Santa's reindeer well deserved breaks.

(6) A "smart cruse control" on the sleigh's dashboard optimizes Santa's travel around the globe. (Railroad locomotive operators are now using GE's technology to optimize their train's momentum to save 10% in fuel.)

(7) Worn on his red suit, a wearable RFID sensor can detect airborne chemical agents in the air, and one day could analyze someone's breath and serve as an earlier indicator of disease.

(8) A 500 GB holographic disc, packing the storage of 200 DVDs, can more compactly store the miles-long list of children's Christmas wishes.

(9) A wireless medical sensor monitors Santa's breathing and makes sure he remains his jolly old self... GE scientists have developed a sensor that can measure individual heartbeats without any wires or attachments.

(10) And finally, an asset intelligent tracking system for those hard-working elves at the North Pole. It can keep track of Santa's whereabouts, plus the condition of his gift inventory, during the entire round-the-world journey.

Somehow this wizardry seems out of character with the time-honored image of Santa although it answers several questions children have asked of their parents, leading, no doubt, to some very creative responses. I, myself, am still trying to figure out how he manages to get up and down those chimneys without soiling that bright red suit. Or how he enters the living room of an apartment that has no chimneys.

Merry Christmas everyone, and may Santa bring you the classic sled of your dreams.